This is two days late. Sorry about that. I'm a big fan of that fact that my two most avid (or at least vocal) readers are a married couple. Newly married, college-friends and all that...but it's kind of the angle on life I'm hacking through right now.
It's been a strange, exciting, exhausting week, and I'm really only posting tonight because I just need to talk for awhile and I'm not sure how to do that...so here I am.
This past week was the Great Lakes East Regional Staff Conference for InterVarsity. In short, the IVCFGLERSC. It was fun, but it was mostly an overwhelming learning experience and it made me much more exhausted than I would have ever expected going in.
We talked largely about identifying and "using" missional students to move the mission of InterVarsity to the center of everything we do. It was pretty evident that we were learning it from someone who is developing the theory, because there are a ton of kinks that definitely still need to be worked out (mostly, how do you use it in a thriving chapter?). I guess I get to be on the frontlines of that in a way. Mostly though, I just hope to survive for awhile. By the end of the week, I kind of felt out on a limb even farther than I was given what going to Hillsdale already meant in terms of adjustment and differences I would be facing...now there's a whole new way to "do InterVarsity" that I felt like I was learning. I often felt like I was being thrust forward without a net, so to speak. It's okay...it was just a lot, because even on top of all of that was a sort of strategic social maneuvering that comes with being one of the new guys. It kind of sucks to be a new guy again. Sure, the rest of the region's staff are great at welcoming...but that never meant I quite felt like I knew what I ought to be doing. There's also a kind of old/young staff divide that's very very unclear, because some old staff fall on the young side of it. It's very unspoken and not really hard, fast, or animosity-creating...but it's just another part of the whole social sphere.
All of this is to say that it was a weird but still great week. It was great to be not-home for a few days. It was great to break out of the FD-trenches for awhile. And it was great because next year, I won't be a new guy. That, and it was great to connect with other first-year staff.
So that's the nuts and bolts of what I've been up to lately, and it's been good, basically.
It has made being home again kind of, well, exactly what it was when I left, but I realize more that I don't enjoy that so much. That being said, the end is at least coming into sight.
I've only got one former girlfriend without a boyfriend right now (not counting the 1 with a husband...). I don't think that really means much, but I'm not sure what I'll think if she ends up in a relationship. This probably wouldn't be note-worthy if it weren't for how many of them there are...heck, right now, since October, is the longest I've been single since May 2005 (october 03 before that...). I would like to not dwell on that enough that I don't even mention it, but I can't help but think about it from time to time. I often wonder what my life would be like right now if I was dating someone. That's something I kind of thought about from time to time at the RSC....there's just a lot of married people...married people not all that much older than me (really, if I were the right age for my grade, not older at all), and people of the same age close to engagement, on staff. That being said, there are a lot of, well, some, at least, totally single people too, like me. I can't really decide which is cooler, from a staff perspective. On one hand, sure, it's obvious being married to the right person at the right time is definitely better than indefinite singleness... but there were definitely times when I felt cool just to be one of the very few single guys. (like really, less than 10 few). I don't know where this is going really...just something that came to mind from time to time.
I try not to eat meat anymore, and I haven't for four days now.. That's largely on purpose and kind of accidental. It's on purpose because I did it intentionally...but it wasn't supposed to happen now. It just happens when I have self determination of what I eat for meals/snacks...and I'm nearly to a week running of that. I don't know if I'll ever be completely vegetarian, and I don't know how vegans do it...but as often as I can, I'm going to eat as few animals as I can.
I really really really want to go back to China. I don't think I can next year because of ONS. I hope to as soon as possible though..... it was our last day in China two years ago right now....like, we were getting on the plane in just a few hours. In some ways, it's hard to believe it's been that long...in others, it feels like it's been longer. Just like graduation...it almost feels like I was never in college sometimes, then others it's hard to believe I'm done. It's really hard to believe I'm not going back to Wooster this fall, but then again, it's about impossible ti imagine my self going back to Wooster as a student again. It's like dating. Part of me wishes, in some way about each former girlfriend, that I had never broken up with her. That being said, I can't imagine my life having dated any one of them this long. Is it that way for everyone? In any event, I think I can usually supply more dating analogies than most because I have many and varied examples to pull.......
I don't think I'll date two more girls in my life. I guess I don't know, but whereas dating used to sound appealing, it just doesn't anymore. I feel like an over-ambitious Christian-school girl in saying that, but it's true. Dating for dating's sake just isn't on any sort of agenda I could see myself having again. That could be problematic....
I have a twitter account now, by the way...it's www.twitter.com/dulacian I don't know how many of you out there do anything with twitter. I don't do much, but I enjoy following people that do...primarily basketball news outlets, as it is now.
I didn't receive many gifts while I was away, to my staff account, but the two I did receive were unexpected surprises. Those are my favorite sort. It'd be nice if I ever ended up with a huge unexpected surprise...I guess we'll see what happens as time goes on. That being said, it's nice to see fruit from actual work too, and I've got a meeting on Wednesday to make work come full circle....it's a contact I met at a church I spoke at thanks to my grandma...that's kind of fundraising at its best. Sometimes (and I know this isn't true.....always) when friends and family give, I almost feel like they're doing it out of a sense of necessity or guilt. That's not that case at all with people I don't know at all, so that's very cool.
My grandma, on my mom's side has been remarkably helpful in everything. She's been telling people, like, everyone she meets, about what I'm doing and she calls or e-mails me almost weekly with new ideas. It's quite the blessing when I don't feel all that supported by the vast majority of the rest of my family....
I don't think I have much more to say. I hope you have a wonderfully restful rest of your weekend.
-Zack
"Want advice? Girls need attention.
Or are you different from all mine?
For all it's worth, she's got attention"
-Ben Folds
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