On down the lines of Difference

It's the last day of classes here at Hillsdale.  It's the last day I'll be on campus this semester too.  There's direct correlation.

To say it's been a good semester is the simplest way to describe what I've experienced these last 15 weeks.  But it's far from that simple.  Simply though, I'll just say that everyday gets better here, or at least every week does and the net average of how much I enjoy it at Hillsdale, trying to do ministry here, improves every Thursday night.  I'm falling into some kind of comfort level with the students and I feel like I have real rapport with some key students in key situations.  I won't say it's been my best semester of ministry, but I was far from this effective my second semester at Wooster.  Of course, I wasn't on staff then either.

But it's not about my effectiveness, and at the end of the day it's far from about my own enjoyment of what I do. Everyone wants to enjoy their own job right?  But I struggle to even call this my job.  It's bigger than that.  It's bigger than calling it my career even for that matter.  It's, more, perhaps, than anything else, a place I am to be and a place I need to be.  Our regional director always reminds us that we're not chapter staff, we're campus staff, and I feel more and more all the time like my call is a lot less to be here for the students doing ministry as much as it's to be here for the ministry going on amongst the students.  There are enough Christians here that they don't need me, at all, to have a fellowship.  Some of them are better leaders than I could have hoped to be as a student.

But I've found that a student, no matter how skilled, is always going to be a bit nearsighted.  I'm sure I was as a student.  I'm probably far from the best staff worker in the world, and I'm reminded of that all the time because my staff partner here at Hillsdale definitely could be, but that's not really a question even worth begging.  If all I accomplish on any given day is helping students see things in a way they wouldn't on their own, then I've done something almost magical, and that's actually a fairly common occurrence.  Talent matters, experience matters, calling matters more.  But it's all a series of differences that we run along, that we base everything on.  I'm "effective" on campus because of the ways I can challenge students in the areas I differ from them, because of the way I see things that they don't. I'm also effective on campus because there are enough things I can relate to students on.  Both are required and in any given situation, in any given settings, your differences are a strength and a hindrance...but so are the commonalities.

I have no idea what the future holds.  I have no idea what series of places I'll be or what situations I'll someday find myself in.  But I'll have more or less similarities and differences with those around me and the crux will always be finding the leverage to do anything with them.

But it expands.  It's cultural.  It's values-system based.  Without the deepest possible diversity, we're not playing with a full deck.  And for that reason, I lament the separation in which we all live.

-Zack