The Middle

The future starts today.  Though I think of those who read this as a sort of ambiguous cloud, I recognize that I actually know most of you in person and the bulk of our relationship is completely offline.  I prefer that, so that's not at all shocking to me.  But even so, I feel like I make things unofficially official by writing about them on here.  It's like a place to make announcements but it's off the beaten path of the information superhighway so that it's not like a facebook status or even a tweet (depending on who you are or how you roll, your own signposts, depending where they land, will differ....a celebrity's twitter is his or her most public form, probably followed by his or her blog, then facebook, provided he or she has all of those).  So this is a bit of a cop-out, but I felt like I had to make it known so I could really get down to brass-tacks:

Today, I'm officially making real steps toward my future on staff in Cleveland.  In a conversation with my supervisor, he suggested I step away a bit from duties at Hillsdale so I could concentrate on fundraising toward Cleveland.  That doesn't mean a huge change...a few less hours on campus really.  But it means I'm starting to craft the resources, make the contact, communicate the mission, for a new place.

But I'm very much in the middle; in between the here and now and the future.

The here an now is keeping on with the ministry through the beginning of Octoberish.  The future is planting and building a ministry at Cleveland State.

The result is a task-list mixed with supporting and developing, as I can, what's here, and developing the support base for Cleveland.  The other result is a bag of mixed emotions, even more mixed.

Here's a concatenation of a rundown:
-leaving Hillsdale (+) this is a hard place to work and students often seem to wish I wasn't around
-leaving Hillsdale (+) there is literally 0 financial support to be gained in the larger community.  Alumni distrust InterVarsity and the town of Hillsdale is impoverished.
-Leaving Hillsdale (+) Capitalism is next to godliness here, and I believe, in reality, capitalism is the #1 reason American Christianity is growing more and more impotent, and we increase our embrace of the unbiblical and idolatrous ideology it truly is.
-leaving Hillsdale (-) There are some brilliant students here and working with them has been a joy
-leaving Hillsdale (-) I'll have poured 2+ years into this place and I'm leaving it for something unestablished
-leaving Hillsdale (-) I'm walking away from a ministry on the verge of exploding (in a good way) that didn't even exist when I got to campus..it's like sending Warren Buffet to college, if you're Warren Buffet's parents.
-Going to Cleveland (+) it's my favorite city in the world and living there, being there, breathing, eating, working there feels like something I was created to do.
-Going to Cleveland (+) I have friends there!  Alexandra has a job there!  Only an hour from Wooster!
-Going to Cleveland (+) I know people who care about Cleveland!  I can fundraise all over the state I come from by working in the for which everyone has some kind of sympathetic city!
-Going to Cleveland (-) Chapter Plant!  From 300 to 0.  Yikes.
-Going to Cleveland (-) New church, new house, new routines, new...life.  New things bring stress.
-2011 (+) New wife New life New beginning...can't count out the value of a fresh start and the excitement of getting to spend the rest of my life with the most incredible person I've ever met...


I don't know if those are balanced or what....It's a bit more complex than that, as shades of negative and positive seep in on every attribute.  It does not matter though...I'm not trying to make a decision...this is a multi-faceted reality that I'm mostly very excited to embrace.

Today, is the beginning.

I don't know if what I do at Cleveland State will transform the city, but I pray it does.  I pray that even one student I work with will decide to start working in the city for the Kingdom of God...one is better than none, and from one, is two so much?  It's a snowball, but right now, it's barely a flake....

-Zack

"I’ma part of the problem, my problem is I’m peaceful
And I believe in the people."

-Lupe Fiasco